Talking to Myself Does Not Constitute a Conversation

I talk too much.

This is not a revelation to my family and friends.  They have all had to sit and listen while I grabbed a conversation by the throat and proceeded to strangle it.

Sorry about that.

It should comfort you, if only a little, to know that I am aware of my lack of listening skills and to understand that I really am making a conscious effort to change them.  I don't intend to take control of every verbal intercourse, and I feel terrible about myself whenever it happens...but changing is not easy.

Let me make an honest confession: one reason I talk so much is because I have a personal bias towards my opinions--I tend to think my thoughts are always logical and correct.  I will feel the same way about your opinions as long as they agree with mine.  Anyway, there is a disillusioned part of me that believes you are getting a special favor when you are given my thoughts.

Again, I apologize for being so stupid, selfish, and closed-minded.

But there is another reason that I often dominate conversations, and it is one that you quiet people can share the blame on: some people just don't talk.  I am not saying that is always bad, but considering that conversations require verbal interaction from more than one party, saying nothing when you are with another person pretty much assures that conversation won't happen.  It also guarantees that someone like me will grow uncomfortable with the silence and will feel the need to fill it with awkward banter.

The quiet person will think, "I wish they would shut up" and the talkative one will be praying for the other party to "say something!"

The point of this post is not that I talk too much, but rather, it is intended to recognize that my talking too much, kills conversation.  And, it is to point out that other people's lack of input also kills conversation.  This is not to tell you how much to say and how much not to say, because that will obviously vary with the depth of the relationship; but it is to challenge us to be sensitive during times of communication to know when to listen and when to speak.  It is to remind us that relationships will grow in direct proportion to how well we learn to interact with the other parties involved.

It amazes me then, that when we consider a relationship with God, most of us either talk all the time (giving our recommendations and demands), or we only listen (thereby denying God the pleasure of having a relationship with a people willing to share their hearts).

I believe I have to talk less and listen more.

I believe some people might want to share a little more freely.

And most important of all, I believe that God would like to have regular conversations with each of us that involve both talking and listening.