Flaming Orange Seatshirts, Dog Chains, and "Soul Sisters" iron ons...or...What Would Oprah Do?

Many years ago (during my pre-teen life) I had a friend who was very influential.  I will call him "Dirk" because it sounds cool, and because it is not his real name (I am doing that names are changed to protect the innocent thing).  Dirk was the leader of our recess group (which carried over into social activities like attendance at football games,etc.) because he was smart, athletic, and really funny.  We all wanted to be a part of the fellowship that he led because of these qualities, and sometimes we were willing to compromise certain things like rationality and common sense in order to be a member of Dirk's inner circle.

 

There came a day when Dirk had an extraordinary idea.  He wanted to start a gang.  Keep in mind that we were early seventies elementary students and realize that the word "gang" in those days (at least for us) stood for something harmless.  And stupid. 

 

There was a group of four of us (counting Dirk) that comprised the gang.  We were his "band of brothers" and what Dirk suggested to us was based on a recent visit to  a local five-and-dime store.  He had seen "the coolest sweatshirts" on sale that were bright (even blinding) orange.  He thought that we should all have one.  He also spotted a great deal on dog chains that could be attached to a belt loop and which Dirk believed would accessorize our bold colors with strength.  Finally, and best of all, there were some iron-on patches that were in a clearance bin for fifty cents each.  It was those patches that would give us our name and our identity.  And, he informed us, the only patch for which at least four were available read, "Soul Sisters."

 

I don't want to insult anyone or anything now, and at that time such a feeling was the last thing on our mind.  Dirk thought that Soul Sisters was a cool name.  He thought that the patch was cool.  He thought that the color of the sweatshirt was cool.  He thought that the dog chain would look cool as a part of the "uniform," and Dirk also thought that it would be cool if all of us bought those things and wore them (with the Soul Sisters iron-in boldly plastered on our chests) when we hung out together in places that were not school.

 

So, because Dirk was the "prophet of cool" to our small group, we all went shopping.

 

Over the course of life I have discovered that other people have the same kind of influence on people that Dirk had.  They might not have gangs, but they do have television and radio shows.  They tell us what to think, what to eat, and what not to wear.  Perhaps the most obvious personality in this encouragement by cool people came in a segment called "Oprah's Book Club."  This was a television recommendation by a really nice lady that hosted a ridiculously adored talk show that told us what books we should fork over our hard earned money to buy and...read.  And because her thoughts on what was good meant so much to people, many otherwise unknown literally works became huge best-sellers.

 

While I now know that I should not listen have listened to everything that Dirk said, I also know that I should not be so influenced by the encouragements of the world.  When I think of my parents, I know that they had to wonder about my decision to follow Dirk's lead.  While they did not make me refuse to purchase the products that would "make me cool," they certainly had other ideas as to what advice I should listen to.  They wished I would know that their words were better advice.

 

The main concept here is that we listen to things (like orange sweatshirts) that are bad advice.  God, however, simply tells us to listen to him.  "I am smarter than Dirk, book lists, your wardrobe, etc.  Just listen to me.

God has a warning in the Psalms that we shouldn't listen to the counsel of the ungodly.  About the definition of "ungodly," I would suggest that it simply means people who don't think that God exists...and if they do...who don't think that God should have any say about how we behave in the world that He created.

The only thing I am saying is that God is wisdom.  He understands what is smart and not so smart about His creation.  And I think that even though He rarely forces Himself on us, He does wish that we would sometimes look at Him and say, "What should I do?"

I am pretty sure that He might discourage bright orange sweatshirts, dog chains, and clearance rack iron-on patches.  While Dirk was a really great friend, I am pretty sure that His wisdom was rarely based upon the recommendations of God.  And as I look back from my current vantage point, I can find at least one glaring episode to use as proof.

Sorry Dirk.

Running into God at the Supermarket Checkstand

There are a great many people that I know.  Some I call acquaintances, some I call associates, and others I call friends.  Actually I would consider almost all of the people in these categories to be friends, but most of them would have a qualifying label added--something like "casual."

 

I like most of the people that I cross paths with from day-to-day during the course of work, shopping, church, etc.  I think that most of them like me and when we greet each other with a "Hello" or short conversation, it is typically pleasant and worthwhile.  However, few of them will end up attending ball games or family events with me.  Fewer of them will call me on the phone to share their latest triumph or tragedy.  The reality of life is that most of us have many "friend" relationships that are like that, but only a small handful of really close, intimate friends.

 

It isn't that we are all jerks and don't want to have more deep bonds of friendship, rather, it is simply a matter of the economy of time--there aren't enough hours in a day to invest deeply into all of the relationships that we encounter.  Even as I write this blog, my dog, Jack, is bouncing a rubber ball at my feet and insisting that I repeatedly wrestle it from him and then throw it down a tiled hallway so that he can pursue it.  I keep telling him that I am busy.  Jack is a really good friend of mine (and I do spend a great deal of time with him), but often (even now), I have to insist, to his dismay, that I have other things to take care of.  Taking friendships to more personal levels takes time that might be required elsewhere, and energy that might have never existed.  That is why all of us must limit our very close friendships, even if we wish we did not have to.

 

It is the fact that intimate friendships require time, effort, and energy that makes them so special.  When someone invests those things in us, they are making a powerful statement that we are worth it.  Of all of the things in life that they could choose to treat as special, they have decided that we should be on the list.  That says many things.  It might say that we are kind, responsible, helpful, and maybe even valuable...but I think the most important thing might be that they like us and want to include us in the very serious committment of life.  That is profound.  And it is an incredible compliment.

I wonder sometimes, however, about our friendship with God.  Is He just someone that we pass with a wave on the street, but quickly move on by because we don't have time to talk?  Do we call Him in the evening with a recap of the challenges of our day, and maybe to discuss our dreams and aspirations?  Or do we not have the time to invest because it is already being put into the "big football game on television" fund?  And when we go places, do we ever bother to invite Him along?

The real question is this: is God a casual friend, or the dearly cherished sharer of our heart and life?  It takes time to let God be our confidant.  It takes energy.  It takes investment.  When we give those things, however, I am certain that God is happy, honored, and complimented.  Our real friendship is meaningful to Him.  And when we give it, I am sure that He is more than willing to give His in return.

That is a pretty strong rate of return on our investment.